The night before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas, and Gor was so slow,
Not a pixel was active, just a few lame AO's.
The badasses furred their FC's in the hay,
With everyone else in IM's marked away.
The slave girls were nestled all snug in their kennels,
Save the one OOC drama queen going mental.
And I on my poseball, arms wrapped round my lady,
About to create an in character baby.
When out on the docks there arose such a ruckus,
I was sure that some huge group was coming to fuck us.
I ran to the wall, the lag dripped like molasses,
I blew the raid horn, 'Now get off your dead asses!"
Some raiders are coming! Some scurrilous bastards!
Let's get in position or it will be a disaster!
The commander just laughed. "I know you want to pewpew,
But cam down to the docks, it's just a fat little dude!"
He's wearing a red suit, he's ancient and portly,
He's a bearded old sot, or a gluttonous Torvy.
Just look at that rig, and those healthy tabuk!
We should ambush him there, and pillage his loot!
But no sooner had those bold words passed from his lips,
Than the fat little man disembarked from the ship.
He grinned as he settled his butt in a sleigh,
And motioned his minions to take him away.
He rose with the wind, wicked gleam in his eye,
Then readied his weapons as his sleigh cruised the sky.
"Come Dancer, come Dasher, fly swift, straight and narrow!"
Why the senile old coot, he had names for his arrows!
His darts pelted on down like a harsh acid rain,
One in line with the next, like the cars on a train.
And before we could rise up to fend off this odd trouble,
We found ourselves fallen, encased by the bubble.
Then he landed his craft in the midst of the fort,
With a loud belly laugh and just a hint of a snort.
"You fools need to work at the fine art of war!"
He pulled out some ropes "Are you really of Gor?"
He tied us off quickly, and with captivity looming,
Our commander grew angry, his face was just fuming.
"You attacked without reason, you attacked with pure malice!
I'm afraid that your actions are all quite invalid."
"Your prowess with weapons is truly misleading,
You broke all our rules, you clearly were cheating!"
"We don't allow aimbots, enhancements or tarns.
Your dress and behavior is great cause for alarm!"
He guffawed like a madman and poked with his boot.
"Shut up you dumb bastard, and give me your loot.
I addressed your concerns before I ever came in,
When I bribed all the mods and then purchased the sim."
He lined up the women, and then hogtied the men.
"You've seen me before, and you'll see me again."
My name is St. Nick and I've come for some nookie.
I grow ever weary of the same milk and cookies!"
He regarded the women as though at a buffet,
Took the commander's FC as the perfect entree.
She protested and squirmed, but he stashed her inside
"Now get ready my pretty for an awesome sleigh ride!"
He grinned as he planted his flag at the dock,
Rescues in one hour, so start watching the clock.
Then he rose is his sleigh and vanished into the night.
"A merry Christmas to all... and to all a good fight!"
(copyright) Martyr Magnifico
**this is hilarious!!** love it
I acquired permission from the owner to post here :) and permission granted
From Whispering Moons
Cielo!
Twas the night before Christmas, and Gor was so slow,
Not a pixel was active, just a few lame AO's.
The badasses furred their FC's in the hay,
With everyone else in IM's marked away.
The slave girls were nestled all snug in their kennels,
Save the one OOC drama queen going mental.
And I on my poseball, arms wrapped round my lady,
About to create an in character baby.
When out on the docks there arose such a ruckus,
I was sure that some huge group was coming to fuck us.
I ran to the wall, the lag dripped like molasses,
I blew the raid horn, 'Now get off your dead asses!"
Some raiders are coming! Some scurrilous bastards!
Let's get in position or it will be a disaster!
The commander just laughed. "I know you want to pewpew,
But cam down to the docks, it's just a fat little dude!"
He's wearing a red suit, he's ancient and portly,
He's a bearded old sot, or a gluttonous Torvy.
Just look at that rig, and those healthy tabuk!
We should ambush him there, and pillage his loot!
But no sooner had those bold words passed from his lips,
Than the fat little man disembarked from the ship.
He grinned as he settled his butt in a sleigh,
And motioned his minions to take him away.
He rose with the wind, wicked gleam in his eye,
Then readied his weapons as his sleigh cruised the sky.
"Come Dancer, come Dasher, fly swift, straight and narrow!"
Why the senile old coot, he had names for his arrows!
His darts pelted on down like a harsh acid rain,
One in line with the next, like the cars on a train.
And before we could rise up to fend off this odd trouble,
We found ourselves fallen, encased by the bubble.
Then he landed his craft in the midst of the fort,
With a loud belly laugh and just a hint of a snort.
"You fools need to work at the fine art of war!"
He pulled out some ropes "Are you really of Gor?"
He tied us off quickly, and with captivity looming,
Our commander grew angry, his face was just fuming.
"You attacked without reason, you attacked with pure malice!
I'm afraid that your actions are all quite invalid."
"Your prowess with weapons is truly misleading,
You broke all our rules, you clearly were cheating!"
"We don't allow aimbots, enhancements or tarns.
Your dress and behavior is great cause for alarm!"
He guffawed like a madman and poked with his boot.
"Shut up you dumb bastard, and give me your loot.
I addressed your concerns before I ever came in,
When I bribed all the mods and then purchased the sim."
He lined up the women, and then hogtied the men.
"You've seen me before, and you'll see me again."
My name is St. Nick and I've come for some nookie.
I grow ever weary of the same milk and cookies!"
He regarded the women as though at a buffet,
Took the commander's FC as the perfect entree.
She protested and squirmed, but he stashed her inside
"Now get ready my pretty for an awesome sleigh ride!"
He grinned as he planted his flag at the dock,
Rescues in one hour, so start watching the clock.
Then he rose is his sleigh and vanished into the night.
"A merry Christmas to all... and to all a good fight!"
(copyright) Martyr Magnifico
**this is hilarious!!** love it
I acquired permission from the owner to post here :) and permission granted
From Whispering Moons
Cielo!
